Thursday evening
I am feeling better with things now. Thank you for the
messages with words of encouragement and wisdom (and book suggestions).
Everything has helped, and especially the comments below:
- Take time for yourself by yourself to enjoy something without having to make sure everyone else is OK with it too
- Don't be angry, it uses up far too much personal energy for little or no purpose. There is nobody to be angry with here ... Without a target, anger can only rebound on you or on those close to you, worst of all on Val.
- Val is strong, as are you. Yes it is all exhausting, debilitating, demeaning, demanding and damn it all.....it is one cancer moment; moment by moment. Of course you are feeling sorry for yourself, and your beloved -- and sleep and writing, and drinking, and walking, and breathing will help.
- I think of other long roads for you and know you have the love, resilience and will to go through this, but I also understand hitting walls, big anger and exhaustion. The grace we find means nothing without these emotions...so find your outlets and be kind with yourselves as you feel everything.
It is nurturing to receive your support in this way, and I
welcome it. Thank you.
Val is experiencing dry eyes, a runny nose, and the ongoing
fatigue...but otherwise is remarkably chipper. This morning, she assisted with
the first session of Yoga North's cancer class (which she founded many years
ago) and was still upright at supper time. Remarkable, really.
We will head to the cottage on Saturday for the long
weekend. That will be good. We wish you a happy Thanksgiving, however
you spend it.
Amanda
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